When I heard that they were coming out with a Dragonlance movie last year, I wasn't too excited. I'm not that big a fan of Dragonlance (given that there is only one good character in the entire series and he's dead). Then people started raving over the fact that Kiefer Sutherland was taking on the role of Raistlin Majere i.e. the only good character in the entire series and it was like 'Wow! Jack Bauer's going to go all 24 on Raistlin. He'll snatch Goldmoon, Laurana and Tika away from their loser husbands and convert Kitiara to the Jack Bauer side and he'll all save the US president in 24 hours again only this time he'll do it with meteor swarms and finger of death. Oh and along the way, he'll look at the blasted kender, drain him of his soul and uses his carcass as a portable toilet just to despise the kender.' Sounds interesting enough.

Then I watched the movie.

Good lord...I know that Tanis i.e. the series original main character whines a lot but to listen to him whine...gave it a whole new meaning altogether. He whines more in an hour and a half than my students do in a whole year...and that's saying a lot, considering that they're college students and they're still in their teens.

The animation sucks. They said that this was supposed to be an adult animation but watching it made me think of the original Dungeons and Dragons cartoon (this is a D&D movie despite the tag Dragonlance). Little blood (look at my blood free sword! If talking a lot during fighting is a superpower, then having no blood on the weapon is a magic weapon property), stiff movements, miserable attempts of showing off Tika's boobs...*yawn*

Jack Bauer ruled of course but then again, he's Raistlin Majere. The only character in the original series that everyone liked! Lucy Lawless was passable as a fighter/cleric 2e version except you keep waiting for her to do a Xena. Michael Rosenbaum landed the sorry role of Tanis which must be quite a shock for him after playing Lex Luthor in Smallville; he must have thought that he'll get Raistlin Majere. Michelle Trachtenberg...I heard she was in this movie. Phil Lamarr lands the role of Token Minority...again...and the kender annoyed the crap of everyone, as expected. I hate gods who pretend to be senile old men so Fizban/Paladine falls into that automatically. The squick scene at the end, where you see Laurana i.e young nubile chick make out with Elistan i.e. ancient wise sage just made me choke on my bile and I relished the choking because I saw a young chick make out with an old man. It'll save me from the misery of seeing it again...

TTFN.